Does anyone else sign their children up for swimming classes just to get half an hour to themselves? 
Seems legit right? 
But it’s not how I imagined it. I had these big plans of treating myself to expensive coffee. Using my minutes wisely on my Mac to steal some precious time to type up at least 400 words to add to my children’s book, without the constant echo of ”muuuuummy I’m bored” bellowing from each corner of my home. 

It seems these 30 little minutes have revealed my desperation and need for solitude….

I’m just here wondering…
Does anyone else lock themselves in a cubicle and hide while their children swim? 
In a desperate attempt to avoid all mummy talk, about cake sales and the conversations of first time mummies comparing the specs of their Maxi Cosy and Quinny pushchairs?

I have the added urge for the earth to swallow me up when a swarm of little budding junior paparazzi flock around me gazing at me with innocent wonder and questions for me and their mummies about “why why why is she such a tiny mummy?” 
Part of me wished I had my book finally published to hand over to my little fans so I could cooly candy slide away. 
Slightly befuddled I instead planned my escape route before I had to witness the embarrassed face of mothers trying to conjure up a legit age appropriate answer. 
Given there were more junior papz in the cafe and pool side, I figured a cubicle would grant me the instant peace I craved. πŸ˜…

Honestly, I’m not an arsehole. I am usually quite welcoming to children’s curiosity. I mean after all, that is what’s driving me to write a Children’s book. But after a shit nights sleep and a day of endless questions from my own inquisitive 6 yr old, ranging from “how many legs do woodlice have” to “where does poo come from” – I just want to be in a cubicle by myself, having a photo shoot to convince myself I’ve still got it πŸ’…πŸ» 

To conclude, my embarrassing selfies evidently scream – I need a good nights sleep, but the wink I received from a very hot lifeguard on my way out reassures me that I may indeed still be one hot mumma, despite feeling utterly depleted.

I whole heartedly recommend mums take 30 minutes ‘time out’ for themselves in a cubicle, once a week. Use it as a chance to be brutally honest with yourself…
*You need more sleep

*Be kinder to yourself 

*You are doing one of the hardest jobs in the world and you’re doing a great job! 

*You still have it 

*You are awesome 
Yours truly 

One exhausted mumma bear 

-Torn Pages 


8 thoughts on “LOCKER TALK

  1. I chuckled, cause you are not alone. lol We actually have one-hour swim lessons. I have 3 kids, so one swims, one rides horses, and one plays softball. I find a spot alone to play on my phone, work on my blog or just and relax. Yes, I peep up to see how the kids are doing. And if another little child comes over to talk I may do a bit of small talk, but that’s about it. Go talk and play with your mommy. This is MY time, not babysitting for you. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Exhausted isn’t even the word! I’m chasing after a 17 month old while 7 months pregnant. Momming ain’t easy but it’s so worth it! Great read πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hats off to you Hun πŸ˜… I always look on in awe at mums who have two or more children under 5. I don’t know how you do it, I’m a bad referee lol. I guess as mothers we make little miracles everyday ✨ thank you for reading lovely and do have a cheeky nap with the little s when you can xx


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